Posh, male, pale and stale – we have a Cabinet of incompetents in the image of dictatorial Prime Minister Boris Johnson.
By reducing the number of women (seven to six) and ethnic minorities (four to three), while increasing
the privately schooled (up two to 15), our egotistical PM mutates into a tyrannical President.
In a grotesque display of servility, terrified Tory mannequins chanted a load of pantomime lies at the Cabinet table about new hospitals and nurses to appease their puppet master.
The people’s Old Etonian will regret assuming supreme power when it all goes wrong and the blame for cock-ups and conspiracies leads directly to No10 because that’s the only path.
So if Transport Secretary Grant Shapps is right about the March 11 Budget being delayed, then it is First Lord of the Treasury Johnson’s fault as he turned 11 Downing Street into 10A.
Puppet Chancellor Rishi Sunak, indelicately nicknamed the Maharaja of Yorkshire and facing questions over financial deals which made him a millionaire in his 20s, is the ventriloquist’s dummy.
But Johnson’s honeymoon will end abruptly if Labour picks Lisa Nandy or Keir Starmer as party leader. Blue bricks in the red wall aren’t as solid as Tories like to pretend.
Sajid Javid quitting as Chancellor exposed Johnson’s struggle to square satisfying London hedge fund fat cats and northern England’s grafters.
Posing both as a tax cutter and big public spender is a deceit that will end in spiralling debt and Tory tears.
The sleaze probe over who paid Johnson’s £15,000 Caribbean Christmas bill and criticism that he failed to visit Yorkshire’s flooded communities symbolise the private and public contempt of a chancer.
It’s not lost “oop North” that Johnson pulled on his wellies before the election because votes were at stake. This side of that contest, he floats unhurried on an 80-seat majority with almost five more years in the bank.
Most of his Cabinet are second and third-raters, narcissists preferring sycophants to critical friends.
Free thinkers, independents and even people who simply do their jobs properly are a threat to Johnson.
It’s why he’s sacrificed good governance and what’s best for the country to surround himself with Tory toadies.