Harriette Cole: Our only dates are eating in his car, so I gave him an ultimatum – The Mercury News


DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been seeing this guy for about a year now, and I have brought up the fact that he has not taken me out on a date yet.

Harriette Cole 

He always tells me that he will plan something, but he never does. He comes to see me, but all we do is hang out in his car and eat and talk. It is starting to become predictable and boring. I don’t want to do that all the time.

He complains about not wanting to spend extra money on going out. But not all dates require you to spend money.

So I made it clear that if he does not want to go out and do something, then I don’t want to see him. I feel like he is never going to plan anything, and I am just wasting my time.

Should I stick it out for a little bit longer to give him a chance, or should I just keep the focus on myself and see other people who are willing to do that for me?

Need Fun

DEAR NEED FUN: Before dumping him, plan some activities and invite him to participate. He may be happy to do something fun, but he may not have ideas. His attentiveness counts for something.

See if he is willing to expand his horizons by following your lead. If he refuses or really cannot afford it, you will have to decide if car dates are enough.

DEAR HARRIETTE: COVID has changed a lot for the education system. I just started my freshman year in college, and although I knew things were going to be different than expected, living in a dorm seems pointless.

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